It lurks behind corners, catching women by surprise and disrupting their view of themselves, their bodies, what is normal, and what isn’t. It’s one of the best-kept secrets among women, but the time has come to shine a light on it, expose it, and attack it at the root. What is it? A condition called hypoactive sexual desire disorder, which is when a woman has a reoccurring or consistent lack of sexual thoughts and desires and is bothered by it.
In most circles of our society, it is socially acceptable, embraced, and even praised when women talk about their sexual experiences and desires. Carrie Bradshaw and her pals paved the way for a new kind of sex talk resurgence among women. However, the conversation flows more freely and frequently when all is going well. Most women are embarrassed to talk about their sexual dysfunction to their friends, their partners, and their health care providers. Women shouldn’t be sheepish about this issue, but rather learn more about it and have the confidence to move forward.
It is natural for a woman’s sex drive to fluctuate over time. There can be a variety of reasons for a decrease in sexual activity. Examples include:
- the stage of a relationship;
- life changes like pregnancy, breastfeeding, and menopause;
- side effects of a prescribed medication;
- sleep disorders;
- illness; and
- stress.
If you find that you are bothered by the fact that you cannot recall the last time you truly desired a sexual encounter with your partner and welcomed their advances, there are steps you can take to increase your libido.
How to Attack Your Low Libido:
Take a Self Assessment
1. Can you identify why you are in this sexual rut, by yourself? That might be possible if stress is the culprit in your sexual desire reduction. If not, you should seek advice from a trusted licensed medical practitioner.
2. Talk with Your Partner
Communication is king. Together you can discuss setting aside time for sex, ramping up your sexual activities, or looking for ways to be more intentional during intimate moments.
Remember that stress can be a major love killer. Massage is an excellent way to alleviate stress in your life. When another person massages your body, it stimulates blood flow, ridding your body of toxins. Stress causes cortisol to be released. Cortisol decreases testosterone (yes, women have it too) and testosterone helps the libido. You may consider asking your partner to massage your shoulder, neck, or feet. When couples massage each other, they are more prone to feel relaxed and aroused.
If you think you may be experiencing hypoactive sexual desire disorder, don’t be embarrassed by it. Find someone to help you work through it and know that you aren’t alone!
For more ideas on how to attack low libido, or how to initiate a DIY massage, contact us!